kaykitty47

There you go
You're always so right
It's all a big show
It's all about you

You think you know
What everyone needs
You always take time
To criticize me

It seems like everyday
I make mistakes
I just can't get it right

It's like I'm the one
You love to hate
But not today

So shut up, shut up, shut up
Don't wanna hear it
Get out, get out, get out
Get out of my way
Step up, step up, step up
You'll never stop me
Nothing you say today
Is gonna bring me down

There you go
You never ask why
It's all a big lie
Whatever you do

You think you're special
But I know, and I know
And I know, and we know
That you're not

You're always there to point
Out my mistakes
And shove them in my face

It's like I'm the one
You love to hate
But not today

So shut up, shut up, shut up
Don't wanna hear it
Get out, get out, get out
Get out of my way
Step up, step up, step up
You'll never stop me
Nothing you say today
Is gonna bring me down
Is gonna bring me down

Will never bring me down

Don't tell me who I should be
And don't try to tell me what's right for me
Don't tell me what I should do
I don't wanna waste my time
I'll watch you fade away

So shut up, shut up, shut up
Don't wanna hear it
Get out, get out, get out
Get out of my way
Step up, step up, step up
You'll never stop me
Nothing you say today
Is gonna bring me down

Shut up, shut up, shut up
Don't wanna hear it
Get out, get out, get out
Get out of my way
Step up, step up, step up
You'll never stop me
Nothing you say today
Is gonna bring me down

Bring me down
{shut up, shut up, shut up}
Won't bring me down
{shut up, shut up, shut up}
Bring me down
{shut up, shut up, shut up}
Won't bring me down

Shut up, shut up, shut up

This song is exactly how i feel right now
From Underneath
By: Hawk Nelson

From Underneath I wanted you
To see the first thing I ever poured my heart into
You’ll never know the pain that I’ve been through
I’m not so sure you’ll ever know
And so I’ll make you understand the words that built my life
Were not from you, but from my father’s hand

Do you remember that cold day in December
Leaving everything you knew behind
I may never know how it feels to stand beside you
Or take your hand when I need some direction
And I may never know what it’s like to see you smile back at me
Or know you’d be proud of me

From underneath I promise to erase the past
And let my heart forgive the former you
Replace the dark of old and start brand new
I never thought I’d see the day
I walk toward the end of life and turn the other way
I’m reaching out o take my Father’s hand

It has come to my attention that Kevin's dad is in the hospital...

convo
kaykitty 19: hi'
Vash 13er: hi
Vash 13er: sry if i don't talk much cuz my dad mite die tanight
kaykitty 19: OMG
kaykitty 19: r u serious
kaykitty 19: why!
Vash 13er: car accident
kaykitty 19: OMG!
kaykitty 19: OMG
kaykitty 19: hold on gonna pray real quick
Vash 13er: finefine u do that
Vash 13er: thatz yer custom i suppose
kaykitty 19: what
kaykitty 19: is it not yours
kaykitty 19: ?_?
Vash 13er: ARGH
Vash 13er: lol
Vash 13er: yer like the 3rd person i've explained this too in like 24 hourz!
Vash 13er: lol
kaykitty 19: just wonderin
Vash 13er: basically
Vash 13er: no questions asked afta this like Carlos kept asking ova and ova
Vash 13er: i think bout probz
Vash 13er: God is all knowing
Vash 13er: God knows wat i'm thinking
Vash 13er: thus
Vash 13er: i share my probz with God
kaykitty 19: and
Vash 13er: thus, in a sense, i lay my probz in his hands
Vash 13er: thus, i don't pray
kaykitty 19: but u don't pray?
kaykitty 19: o
kaykitty 19: ok
Vash 13er: yup
kaykitty 19: ok
kaykitty 19: sorry
Vash 13er: lol itz totally koo
Vash 13er: i accept yer custom of prayin
Vash 13er: all i ask is that u accept mine
kaykitty 19: Ook
Vash 13er: then we good that way
kaykitty 19: ok
kaykitty 19: ARG
kaykitty 19: lance was supose to call me and he never did
kaykitty 19: (y aren't u at the hospital)
Vash 13er: wellllll
Vash 13er: not sure
Vash 13er: ges my dad needed space
Vash 13er: 4 ppl in a car
kaykitty 19: is your mo there
Vash 13er: and he's having troubel breating
kaykitty 19: *mom
Vash 13er: betta giv him all that air
Vash 13er: yea she's there
kaykitty 19: U should be there
Vash 13er: nahnah, he needs his space
kaykitty 19: but...
Vash 13er: there was no time....
kaykitty 19: if he
kaykitty 19: if he does die
kaykitty 19: the
kaykitty 19: *then
kaykitty 19: wouldn't u want to be there
Vash 13er: i'd uh.....ratha not think bout it....
kaykitty 19: ok
Vash 13er: yaknow
Vash 13er: it'd be kinda koo in a way
Vash 13er: cuz then i'd be able to cry and it'd be like rly normal
Vash 13er: at his funeral i could giv the eulogy
kaykitty 19: well can i ask one last question
Vash 13er: and it'd be koo like that
Vash 13er: yea koo ask any questions
Vash 13er: itz all good
kaykitty 19: well it is about your dad
kaykitty 19: actually i have 2
Vash 13er: yea shoot i don't care
Vash 13er: shoot em all down ask away
kaykitty 19: do u know what happend to him
kaykitty 19: and did u tell him you love him
Vash 13er: car accident
Vash 13er: can't breath very well
Vash 13er: i didn't rly see blood
Vash 13er: mita been internal
Vash 13er: my last words to him
Vash 13er: were
Vash 13er: Hey Dad-
Vash 13er: but they hadta leave
Vash 13er: and my brother pulled me away...
kaykitty 19: o
Vash 13er: HAHAHA.............(sigh) lol, ne otha questions?
kaykitty 19: :'(
Vash 13er: sry, i'm only laughin cuz i'm jes like Vash in a way
kaykitty 19: o
kaykitty 19: well
kaykitty 19: uhhh
Vash 13er: wat?
kaykitty 19: i feel so bad for you!
Vash 13er: jes ask if u hav any questions
Vash 13er: and don't pity me lol
kaykitty 19: i even started to cry
kaykitty 19: r u cryin or are u scared
Vash 13er: neitha
kaykitty 19: y not
Vash 13er: as heartless as that mite sound, i shed tears more often that u know
Vash 13er: but not for death
Vash 13er: for love and peace
Vash 13er: well, maybe not for peace
Vash 13er: but for love
Vash 13er: death is nothing
Vash 13er: love is something
kaykitty 19: but...
Vash 13er: yea i know wat yer thinkin
Vash 13er: i love the guy
Vash 13er: he's koo n all
Vash 13er: but i dunno.......itz indescribable i suppose
kaykitty 19: well if love is something
Vash 13er: even as mature as i am in some ways, i'm obviously not mature enough for this to cry over
kaykitty 19: then wouldn't you cry for loosing love

I will not ask you to pray because that is not of every ones custom. But i ask you to keep Kevin's dad in your thoughts...

Kay~

Hey people I made a quiz... I would like you all to take it... But don't be a cheater like
Killion.
here is the link... (copy and paste it)

http://www.quizyourfriends.com/yourquiz_IM.php?quizname=041221182446-115171

I'm typing an entry for Kaylee so that she can have good grammar in her entries for once. =P

Anyways yea, I'm over at her house and we're listening to Hawk Nelson! We went to DiCiccos today and made a bet that I couldn't eat a full bowl of spaghetti and ravioli, along with a slice of pizza! Oh wait, this is from MY point of view, isn't it... >.>"

Ehm, yea, today Carlos and I went to Diciccos and I bet Carlos he couldn't eat a full bowl of spaghetti, ravioli, and pizza! He did! Except when he got to the pizza he didn't like it and it was really gross to watch! Carlos doesn't have restaurant manners! Lol

... OMG THAT WAS TOUGH! I actually had to type my own name! Kaylee don't make me do that! ;_;' Anyways, we've just been hanging out since then. Yep. Just talking about stuff and listenign to Hawk Nelson. Kaylee made a quiz!

Well this entry's not gonna be that long. Mainly because we're too busy listening to Every Little Thing and KAYLEE'S FREAKIN' MOM IS STARING AT THE COMPUTER SCREEN! Hi Kaylee's mom! Well, yup, so we've just been chillin' and I just felt like typing in her LJ.

Now for LYRICS from a song that we love!

Every Little Thing - Hawk Nelson

saw her yesterday
and I know I felt the feeling
like the one I felt today
and now
it's taking over me
I've never met anyone like you
cuz I never could find the words to write you

she's been on my mind (she's working overtime)
she's got perfect reason's
said she'd love to talk to Jesus
I bet I believe her when she said
life could be so simple if we all just learned to pray

she's got every little thing I wanted
and it still feels just like the day it started
I said good bye to the broken hearted
and I could never express the way
I felt before tonight
tonight

she sits there all alone
and she's reading from the chapter
that she sometimes calls her own
and now
she's taking over me
cuz the girl I once rejected
has now become the girl of my dreams

she's been on my mind (she's working overtime)
she's got perfect reason's
said she'd love to talk to Jesus
I bet I believe her when she said
life could be so simple if we all just learned to pray

she's got every little thing I wanted
and it still feels just like the day it started
I said good bye to the broken hearted
and I could never express the way
I felt before tonight

she's not an ordinary girl,
I can see it in her eyes
just an ordinary boy
God must have heard my prayers last night (oh last night)

she's been on my mind
she's working overtime
she's got perfect reason's
said she'd love to talk to Jesus
I bet I believe her when she said
life could be so simple if we all just learned to pray

she's got every little thing I wanted
and it still feels just like the day it started
I said good bye to the broken hearted
and I could never express the way
I felt before tonight

she's not an ordinary girl,
I can see it in her eyes
just an ordinary boy
God must have heard my prayers last night

Because I wrote this entry, I feel I have the need to sign my name and dedicate this entry to moi! Mwahahaha!

~Mog/Kay

Today my parents worked so i when to Rachels house... We had a fun time...
we played x-box live for quite a wile. We made rockin breakfast baritos...(rachels dog ate hers) lol... It was quite funny...Then I listened to Hawk Nelson and ate Runts... THAY WERE GOOD!!! and... then rachel got the idead to mold animals out of candel wax. I got the idea to light a fire around the candle to make the wax melt faster. Sow we just lit a fire on the candle... It was so fun. Soon we had a mini bon fire. We sprayed Off (the bug spray on it and it got really big We decided to put the fire out because the candle was melting all over the place. So Rachel got some COLD water to pour on it. hehehe well Whe she pored the water on the fire it exploded!!! It was so funny. We started laughing really hard. Then we had to clean up... that was the hard part... Well now i am hear telling you about the fire and ya...

i am gonna tell you a story...

ONCE OPON A TIME!!! j/k but i will still tell you a stoy

This story is out of the book Chicken Soup for the Christian Teenage Soul
it was written by: Meredith Wertz

To love is to receive a glimpse of heaven.
(quote by Karen Sunde)

The World Won't Stop

People say a teenager's biggest fear is a broken heart. I think they're right. In past relationships I always ran, reasoning that if I didn't give my heart to any one, then they couldn't break it. But when i met Jake last summer, it was diffrent. I fell in love th moment my eyes met his alluring smile.
We played wiffle ball that day under the blistering afternoon sun. I tried to steal second, and i ended up pinned beneath him is scorching sand. I'll never forget looking up to see his almond eyes shinining down onto mine. I instantly let down my guard. By the end of the day, we were revealing our darkest secrets while we played chicken in the refereshing ocean.
Eventually, Jakes hand found mine that day, and our lips met soon after. The monstrous waves crashed like thinder behinde us. I am suprised he didn't hear my punding heart as anxiety raced through my body.
As soon as I kissed Jake, I was afriad to love him. But my fears were soon replaced with a sense of security. So I gave jake my heart and slowly fell for him.
Our personalities clicked, and the next few months were unforgetable. The times we shared were filled with intense talks, innocent kisses and geunuine laughter. The words he spoke, no matter how trivial, always found there way to a place inside my heart.
He attempted to teach me how to play pool, and he proudly introduced me to all of his college friends. I loved how he would call just to hear the sound of my voice, making me feel as if i were the only girl in the world. My face would light up each time his car pulled up in front of my house. His car was old, and there was no mistaking the familiar sound of the rumbling engine and his balring music. "Hey, sweetie," he would say as I climbed into the front seat.
I never questioned falling for Jake until he was no longer there to catch me. He disappeared from my life as quickly as he had come. With him he took a part of my heart that i had never given before. Jake did percisley what he had promised he would never do--he left me defnseless and alone. To this day I'll never know exactly why, but jake simply stoped calling.
Heartbroken, I found myself thinking about him constantly. I missed the scent of his clothes and the way he grasped my hand, carefully curling his fingers around mine. I missed him telling me her didn't want to lose me. I missed how i felt compleat when we where together.
At night I would clutch my fists and bite my lip, too frightened to close my eyes because I would always end up pictureing his silly grin. Every song reminded me of him. My heart wouldn't let go of the love it felt. Every time the doorbell rangI would race down the steps hoping that his familliar loving face would be there waiting for me. My mom would walk into my room to find me staring out my window, gazing at the empty street below. Each day I concentrated on breathing, walking, talking and trying to desparatley not feel.
Eventually, I began to heal my broken heart. My eyes were no longer swollen and red, and i began to accept my life without Jake in it. I slowly understood I was braver the I belived, and I was sronger then I seemed. A guy was not more important than myself, The world would not stop for my grief, and although my heart was broken, it would keep beating just the same.
The other day I returned to the desolate ba=each where it all began. The wind swept strands of hair across my face as the tide slowly crept up the shore line, The waves then quickly retreated, leaving behinde tiny remnants of the past. Through my tears i smiled and relized that love finds people when they are least expecting it, and unfourtenitly it sometimes leaves the same way. However, the memories and lessons, no matterhow short-lived, remain intact forever. Love never leaves; it stays in the heart, and eventually we stop thinking about what we have lost and we are gratefull for what we have gained.
There is a reason why I met Jake, loved Jakeand lost Jake. I can't say I am happy for feeling so much pain, but there was also that warm, tingling feeling iside my heart. It is neessary to love betond my fears and trust beond my doubts if i want to truly live my life. And Yes, perhaps my tears may fall, but I will not.
I guess a teenagers biggest fear is a broken heart. Mine used to be, but not any more. Jake was worth it. After all, it is the wounded heart that makes us all human in the end.

I hope you guys liked the story...(i know i did)

see ya all!
Kay~

This entry is deticated to the writter of this story

O ya
4 days
103 hours
6234 minutes
and 374020 seconds till christmas

Well Well Well,

Today i babysat a girl named Lexi,... SHE IS CRAZY!!!
o well

I feel sick in mind right now... I can't seem to sort out my feelings.

Last night only one thing could have made me happier, but tonight i feel the oposite. I would like to discuss my problems but i just can't... It would make them worse...if you have any put downs pleeze don't put them on this journal entry. I am so tired of that...

I just saw a play with Rachel, Brittner, Carlos, and Aaron. It was so Hilarious!!!

FOU's rock!

Were are my chips and Salsa!!!

OMG you had to be there.

Well I had a good night what did you all do? I hope you had fun too. Post what you did tonight here... (i am interested)

Rachel, my mom, and i saw the grossesed cristmas lights! Ewww... Scared for life and all eternity.

Well see/talk/call you guys laterz!

Kay~

this entery is deticated to anyone who posts what they did tonight.

I have just been crushed...

Hey...
Today i was felling kind of weird because i remembered that today was the 17th of december...

You probablly don't know what the 17h means to me. Well i have a story for ya...

In my family we always have a big cousin sleepover. One year everyone was there exept my cousin Krista. She was home sick and she had a horrible head ache. This confuzed me because Krista usally never missed cousin sleepovers.

We soon found out that she had a cancerois brain tumar. Not the kind you can remove eathier. This put are intaire family into stress. Make a wish foundation sent her to Hawii with her family. There was a point when the tumar started to decrease in size but it never fully went away.

Her favortie band was N'sync at the time right after there last CD came out. On the day she died she wsa listening to that CD... (a few days before she died i visited her. thankfully) (it was horible to see her laying there like that. When it was time to leave she could not say good bye so she held up the I love you sign on her hand (sign languge) )

She passed away on the 17th of December when she was 12 years old.

4 days after the 17th we gathered at her house to get ready for the funeral. And J.C. form N'sync called her house! He wanted to talk to krista. Her mom got to talk to him. Aperently my aunts friend new some one who used to be roommates with J.C. so that is how we got connections.

We gathered at the funeral and there was a place where i whent up to speak. It was so hard on me i started Balling in the middle of my speach. My dad had to come take me off the stage...

So that is why i had mixed emotions today...
This song remides me of her

Na na
Na na na na na

I miss you
Miss you so bad
I don't forget you
Oh it's so sad
I hope you can hear me
I remember it clearly

[Chorus]

The day you slipped away
Was the day I found it won't be the same oh

Na na
Na na na na na

I didn't get around to kiss you
Goodbye on the hand
I wish that I could see you again
I know that I can't oh oh oh oh oh
I hope you can hear me
Cause I remember it clearly

[Chorus]

[Bridge]

I've had my wake up
Won't you wake up
I keep asking why
And I can't take it
It wasn't fake it
It happened you passed by

Now you're gone
Now you're gone
There you go
There you go
Somewhere I can't bring you back

Now you're gone
Now you're gone
There you go
There you go
Somehow you're not coming back

[Chorus x 2]

Na na
Na na na na na
I miss you